Susan Cain explains the Quiet Movement and the secret strength of introverts at Oct 13 event

On Oct. 13 the Glenbard Parent Series hosted award-winning author, Susan Cain in programs based on her bestseller Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking.  

Leadership is often associated with bold confidence and charisma, but many great leaders are deep thinkers, soft-spoken and shy. "Don't think of introversion as something that needs to be cured,” says Cain. Introverts make up about one third of the population, and Cain maintains that asking introverts to act like extroverts is a serious waste of talent and energy. Cain says illuminating the power of quietude will not only free introverts to be themselves, but will also contribute to positive advancements in leadership, parenting and the workforce.

Cain’s teaching changes how society sees introverts and how they see themselves. Cain started the Quiet Movement with her bestsellers “Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverts,” and “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in A World That Can’t Stop Talking.” Her most recent book is “Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole.”

Cain was in conversation with Dr. Marc Brackett. Dr. Brackett is a professor in Yale University’s Child Study Center and founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence.

TAKE-AWAYS

John Mensik Glenbard North Principal hosted the noon event and shared the following takeaway:

“It was very insightful listening to the profound conversion between Susan Cain and Dr. Mark Brackett. Their perspective on the power and strengths of introverts provided me with a greater understanding of the struggles some teens have in an increasingly extroverted world. They encouraged caregivers to see the child in front of them, as he/she is with all the gifts they were given. Each child is unique and needs to be celebrated and acknowledged for their special talents and contributions.

As Cain affirms-don't think of introversion as something that needs to be cured. Everyone shines, given the right lighting”

Antoine Anderson Glenbard East Principal hosted the evening presentation and shared the following takeaway :

“Susan Cain and Bruce Feiler provided wisdom for caregivers to best equip their introverts with the skills needed to flourish in an extroverted culture.

Help them figure out their core passions, so they can build mastery which is much more important than self-esteem. With mastery, they will find connection.

Give your introverted child a ‘longer runway’ that they can take off from. They will get there if we honor their inner temperament and go outward from there. Parents and teachers need to be cautious in their feedback, with less judgement,  to lay the framework and appreciation for who the child truly is. This will go a long way as we celebrate and encourage their gifts and the richness inside their minds, helping bring their extraordinary talents and abilities to the world".

RESOURCES

Q and A from the GPS program  HERE

Susan Cain's TEDTalk 2012  HERE

Susan Cain and Min Kym: The hidden power of sad songs and rainy days TEDSummit 2019  HERE

Susan Cain's web site  HERE

Susan Cain's blog  HERE

PODCAST Quiet: The Power of Introverts with Susan Cain  HERE

The Quiet Manifesto

1. There is a word for “people who are in their heads too much”—thinkers.
2. Solitude is a catalyst for innovation.
3. The next generation of quiet kids can and must be raised to know their own strengths.
4. Sometimes it helps to be a pretend-extrovert. There is always time to be quiet later.
5. But in the long run, staying true to your temperament is the key to finding work you love and work that matters.
6. One genuine relationship is worth a fistful of business cards.
7. It’s okay to cross the street to avoid making small talk.
8. “Quiet leadership” is not an oxymoron.
9. Love is essential; gregariousness is optional.
10. “In a gentle way, you can shake the world.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Dr. Harold Koplewicz addresses adolescent depression, suicide in GPS webinar on September 21

The Glenbard Parent Series: (GPS) Navigating Healthy Families  hosted Harold Koplewicz, MD, the President of the Child Mind Institute in a program based on his best-selling book, More Than Moody as part of Glenbard's Suicide Prevention Awareness Month programming. 

Koplewicz discussed the growing problem of teenage depression in America and offered help to adults differentiate clinical depression from normal teenage angst, disappointment and sadness. Koplewicz explained how to recognize the warning signs of depression and suicide. His presentation explained how adults can counteract general anxiety in children and explained how to best provide them with steady and warm emotional nourishment.

Koplewicz is widely recognized as an innovator and master clinician. He is president of The Child Mind Institute, an independent nonprofit organization exclusively dedicated to transforming mental healthcare for children.

Presentation slides from this event, More Than Moody: how to understand teen depression and raise resilient and secure kids, can be found HERE

Click HERE for a recording of the program.

TAKE-AWAY

Janet Cook, Assistant Superintend of Student Services hosted the event and shared the following takeaway:

"In addressing the growing problem of teenage depression and suicide, world-renowned psychiatrist Dr. Harold Koplewicz likened the role of parents and educators to that of scaffolding used in the "construction project" of building up children. The main pillars are structure, support, and encouragement, while the intersecting planks are monitoring, awareness, warmth, patience, and dispassion (with calm constructive honesty). He describes “swooping in” to fix or handle issues for teens as tantamount to saying “You are incompetent and can’t do it without me.” The goal is to eventually take the scaffolding down when our teens are ready to stand on their own.

Koplewicz advises we prioritize factors that protect kids from depression and suicide, including family and school connectedness, academic engagement, and having future plans and goals. At home, he recommends investing time and attention early on and implementing rituals that make it easy to talk. We also need to engage in kids’ individual interest and use labeled praise (giving specific examples) when kids do positive and helpful things.

If changes in typical behavior point to a possible mental health challenge, be direct with questions about self-harm. Stay calm. Listen to understand their feelings from their point of view, and offer hope that solutions exist. In his closing comments, in response to a question, Dr. Koplewicz welcomed us to use the educational videos below (California Healthy Minds, Thriving Kids Project, under Resources). . They wonderfully support our Glenbard initiatives for student engagement, and offer caregivers information on essential mental health skills." 

RESOURCES

The California Healthy Minds, Thriving Kids Project, provides evidence-based resources to spark important conversations and teach your kids a set of essential mental health skills. These videos feature an engaging host and interviews with a diverse group of real kids. They teach key skills while normalizing the challenges kids face and sparking productive conversations.  There are 5 episodes in the series, each teaching a different mental health skill. Corresponding activity sheets summarize and reinforce key ideas in each video. You can watch the entire series in one session, or watch each episode individually :

• Series for Kids in Elementary School HERE (Child Mind Institute)
• Series for Kids in Middle School HERE (Child Mind Institute)
• Series for Kids in High School HERE (Child Mind Institute)

Videos:

• Koplewicz interviewing actor Emma Stone on her experience with anxiety HERE (YouTube Oct 1, 2018)
• Taking Time for Your Child in 60 seconds by Dr. Harold Koplewicz HERE (YouTube Jun 29, 2017)
• GRIT - Part 2: Resilience – Dr. Harold Koplewicz HERE (YouTube May 5, 2015)

Links: 

• COVID and Kids Mental Health from Child Mind Institute HERE
• 2021 Annual Report, Answering the Call: Scaling Support for Children’s Mental Health HERE
• Child Mind Institute Family Resource Center HERE

Lisa Heffernan and Mary Dell Harrington offer advice on launching teens and young adults

On May 3, 2022, Glenbard Parent Series hosted Grown and Flown: How to Support your Teen, Stay Close as a Family and Raise Independent Adults authors Lisa Heffernan and Mary Dell Harrington in a webinar.

Research confirms the role parents play in the later part of their children’s lives — from the final days of childhood to the threshold of adulthood — is as important as any other life stage. As the college years loom, young people are constantly changing and how we parent them must change 

Heffernan and Harrington's presentation was based on their book, “Grown and Flown: How to Support Your Teen, Stay Close as a Family, and Raise Independent Adults,” which features insights from current and former GPS speakers Lisa Damour, Lori Gottlieb, Ken Ginsburg, Frank Bruni and Rachel Simmons. Heffernan and Harrington will offered perspective on parenting and launching teens and young adults. They will addressed family life, mental health, love, academics, separating and letting go and college life.

Heffernan and Harrington, who are writers, started the online community Grown and Flown seven years ago. They were parenting teens and often felt isolated with their problems. They discovered the teen and young-adult parenting years were conspicuously devoid of resources and community. Today, Grown and Flown is recognized as the No. 1 website and online community for parents of teens, college students, and young adults.

Click here for a recording of the program. 

Takeaway

Glenbard East librarian Gabe Gancarz attended the event and shared the following takeaway: 

"Resist the urge to make high school all about college-don't take their high school years away from them. Don't talk about college too soon, or too often it's ok to keep some things private regarding the college search in conversation with friends and neighbors. And get out of the 1990s, those norms no longer apply - learn the facts. Sometimes kids are not looking for a solution, they are looking for an ear. Caregivers will wage the battle between helping them too little and helping them too much all of their lives. 

Resources

Grown and Flown web site 

Link to Off to College Checklist

Recording of this event on May 3, 2022

GPS speaker and panel to discusses effects of dependency on youth and families on April 19

 

Stephen Hill and addiction psychologist ​Dr. ​Aaron Weiner, and ​clinical psychologist ​Dr. Doug Bolton joined us for a Alcohol Awareness Month presentation on April 19, 2022.  

How does one of four brothers, raised in the same home by loving and supportive parents, end up addicted to drugs for more than a decade while his siblings followed a path to a healthy lifestyle? Hill places a great deal of emphasis on “prevention through protection” and pinpoints potential threats and warning signs for families.

Like other parents of youth addicts, Hill's parents experienced isolation, as well as emotional and financial hardship. Members of their community, friends, and family labeled their son with stigmas. After he hit rock bottom and entered his final treatment program, Hill began to put his life back together. Education, health, wellness and helping others became the top priorities in his life.

After completing his first year of sobriety, Hill was offered a full-time position to work at the same treatment program he went through. He returned to college and earned his J.D. from Brooklyn Law School. In May 2018, he published his memoir “A Journey to Recovery” which became a No. 1 new release in drug dependency on Amazon. 

Following Hill’s remarks, addiction psychologist Aaron Weiner and clinical psychologist Doug Bolton continued this important conversation, giving us  a better understanding of how to prevent and treat a substance use disorder.

For a video of the panel discussion and Q&A session from this event, click HERE 

Take-away

Jordan Esser, Community Initiatives Coordinator, DuPage County Health Department and Project Coordinator, DuPage County Prevention Leadership Team (PLT)

"As the Project Coordinator of the DuPage County Prevention Leadership Team (PLT), I focus primarily on substance use prevention and mental wellness for youth throughout DuPage. For that reason, the PLT is a proud sponsor and partner of the Glenbard Parent Series (GPS) and was happy to partner on the program on April 19th, Stephen Hill-A First Choice and a Second Chance. Stephen shared his truly compelling story about a young man who had an involved, supportive family, was a talented student athlete and good student but who went down a path that started with alcohol and marijuana use and high school and quickly escalated to an opioid addiction. His story is an example of how addiction can happen to anyone and can happen quickly. My main takeaway from this program is the importance of early prevention and talking with your kids about healthy choices, early and often. Although it may not always feel like it, research shows that over 80% of young people ages 10-18 say their parents are the leading influence on their decision whether to use alcohol and drugs. Our kids really do care what we think! That is why it is so important to have clear expectations about youth drug use and make those expectations known to your kids. Share facts with them about the health risks associated with alcohol and drug use during adolescent when their brains and bodies are still growing and the legal risks of underage drug use."

For more tips on how to have these important conversations with your teen, visit the DuPage County Prevention Leadership Team website at www.dupageplt.org. 

Resources

GPS Take 5 Preview of this event

Stephen Hill, Speak Sobriety web site

Web site for Dr. Aaron Weiner

Web site for Dr. Doug Bolton, Formative Psychological Services

Michele Icard provides a model for overcoming parent's language obstacles at GPS event on March 16, 2022

On March 16, the Glenbard Parent Series hosted Michelle Icard in programs based on her book, 14 Conversations You Need to Have by Age 14.

Author Michelle Icard provides a model for overcoming parent's language obstacles. Based on her most recent book, Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen, Icard  guides parents of tweens and teens past their fears and challenges around covering “the important stuff” with their kids and into a confident enough position to have meaningful conversations where their kids will actually engage.  While the book covers fourteen topics, Icard included five from the book:  Becoming Independent, Keeping Creativity Alive, Taking Care of Yourself, Living with Technology, and Helping Others. 

Michelle Icard is a speaker, author, and educator who helps kids, parents, and teachers navigate the complicated social world of adolescence. Her first book, Middle School Makeover: Improving the Way You and Your Child Experience the Middle School Years, is a primer for the social and emotional changes parents and kids navigate when mid-life meets middle school under one roof.

Link here for a recording of the Q and A from the program:  https://youtu.be/ARDYsaKB76E

Community Consolidated School District 89 Superintendent Dr Emily Tammeru and Queen Bee School District 16 Superintendent Dr Joe Williams hosted the events and shared the following takeaway: 

"Icard calls the years from age 11-the mid 20s a ‘construction phase’.  It begins when tweens experience major changes to their brain, body and image, as their #1 fear becomes-am I normal? This period requires the adults in their lives to adapt, and be prepared for these normal, risk taking changes-as youth work to integrate with peers. They need us to pivot to the role of assistant manager, to ‘fix less and listen more’, empathize, get a hobby ('other than our children') and learn a new language in our communication with them: BRIEF, breathe, relate, interview, echo, give feedback. Try not to take these expected changes personally, and make time for fun, together."

RESOURCES

Web site for Michelle Icard

Lindsey Hein Podcast Episode 67: Michelle Icard – Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen (Feb 8, 2022)

GPS Take 5: Parent Preview for this event with Michelle Icard

WGN interview with Icard  (Feb 26, 2021)

Self-compassion pioneer Dr. Kristin Neff shares practices to improve mental health with GPS on Feb 22, 2022

GPS hosted Dr. Kristin Neff on February 22 to walk us through practices designed to increase motivation, foster grit and a growth mindset, and rebound from failure – all through the cultivation of self-compassion.  Our first instinct when we fail, suffer, or feel inadequate may be to criticize or to judge ourselves—but there is a better way to get through life’s hardships, says Dr. Kristin Neff. A way that enables us to achieve our highest potential and lead more contented, fulfilling lives. And that is through self-compassion --  a way of relating to ourselves kindly.

Neff says self compassion has three components (more here):

1. 1. Self-kindness vs. Self-judgment 
2. 2. Common humanity vs. Isolation
3. 3. Mindfulness vs. Over-identification

Dr. Kristin Neff is a pioneer in the field of inner strength training and self-compassion. She is the first to empirically study the concepts and create a simple, actionable guide proven to increase motivation, boost resilience, and improve mental health. Both an Insight Meditation practitioner and an associate professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin, her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Atlantic, and Harvard Business Review, among others. She is also the co-developer of an empirically supported training program called Mindful Self-Compassion, and the co-author of The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook as well as Teaching the Mindful Self-Compassion Program: A Guide for Professionals.

Glenbard South Principal Jessica Santee hosted the event and shared the following takeaway:

 "Dr. Neff provided insight into the many benefits of self-compassion (like greater happiness and calmer households), which involves being kind to ourselves in times of struggle. Self-compassion is not about making yourself feel better at the expense of others, but rather, it involves cultivating feelings of self-worth in any setting – in success or failure. It is treating yourself the way you would treat a friend or a loved one by noticing the sadness, extending empathy and recognizing that it’s human to fail. As caregivers, we need to model self-compassion. In doing so, we let our children know that they, too, are valued and deserving of kindness."

Q and A from this event: GPS Take 5 -The Power of Self Compassion with Kristin Neff (2-16-22) VIDEO HERE

RESOURCES

Web site for Self-Compassion Dr. Kristin Neff  HERE

Kristin Neff: The Three Components of Self-Compassion (Oct 16, 2014) VIDEO HERE

Kristin Neff at TEDx – The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion (Feb 6, 2013) VIDEO HERE

The Broken Brain Podcast with Dr. Kristin Neff - Dr. Mark Hyman (Jun 11, 2020) HERE

TED Checking In with Susan David: Self-soothing exercises with Dr. Kristin Neff  HERE

Dr. Mona Delahooke speaks on her book Brain-Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids

On March 3, the Glenbard Parent Series hosted noted clinical psychologist Dr. Mona Delahooke in a program based on her book, Brain-Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids.

Brain-Body Parenting empowers parents with tools to help their children develop self-regulation skills while also encouraging parental self-care, which is crucial for parents to have the capacity to provide the essential “co-regulation” children need. When parents shift from trying to secure compliance to supporting connection and balance in the body and mind, they unlock a deeper understanding of their child, encouraging calmer behavior, more harmonious family dynamics, and increased resilience.

Delahooke is a licensed clinical psychologist with more than 30 years of experience caring for children and their families. Her just released book is Brain-Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids. She is a senior faculty member of the Profectum Foundation, an organization dedicated to supporting families of neurodiverse children, adolescents, and adults. She is a trainer for the Los Angeles County Department of Mental Health and is a member of the American Psychological Association and holds the highest level of endorsement in the field of infant and toddler mental health in California, as a Reflective Practice Mentor (RPM).

Rebecca Sulaver ,Glenbard Assistant Director of Teaching and Learning, hosted the event and shared the following takeaway:

"Mona Delahooke wants caregivers to de-emphasize behavior management and shift the lens from consequences/punishment of challenging  behaviors, to an understanding that the behavior IS the message.  Look at like what lies beneath -the tip of the iceberg. What is happening in the body, brain and the central nervous system ? Does the child feel safe? Kids do well if they can. Observe, Interpret, then take action to meet their needs. Create a toolbox (breathing techniques, exercise, music, journaling, self-talk) to calm. Understand some stress is necessary to grow. What works: elevate the relationship with your child-make it a top priority! Find simple moments to connect, and play, so all can restore".

A recording of the Q and A from the event is HERE

RESOURCES

Website for Dr. Mona Delahooke HERE 

Dr. Mona Delahooke Podcasts HERE

Bright and Quirky Interview with Dr. Mona Delahooke and Dr. Stephen Porges VIDEO HERE

Bright and Quirky Interview How to Approach Kids’ Challenging Behaviors, with Dr. Mona Delahooke VIDEO HERE

What Does it mean to Look Beyond Behaviors? (Feb 3, 2021) VIDEO HERE

The Most Important Question To Ask About Children’s Behavioral Challenges VIDEO HERE

Take 5: Preview of Dr. Mona Delahooke’s event VIDEO HERE

David Epstein discusses his latest book, "Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World" at GPS event on Jan. 26, 2022

On Jan. 26 the Glenbard Parent Series  hosted David Epstein in a program titled, "The Secrets of Success"  based on his book, Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World. 

In his book, Range, Epstein examined the world’s most successful athletes, artists, musicians, inventors, forecasters, and scientists. He discovered that in most fields—especially those that are complex and unpredictable—generalists, not specialists, are primed to excel. Generalists often find their path late, and they juggle many interests rather than focusing on one. They’re also more creative, more agile, and able to make connections their more specialized peers can’t see. He also makes a compelling case for actively cultivating inefficiency. Failing a test is the best way to learn. Frequent quitters end up with the most fulfilling careers. The most impactful inventors cross domains rather than deepening their knowledge in a single area. 

David Epstein is an investigative reporter at ProPublica and prior to that was a senior writer at Sports Illustrated.  He has also written the New York Times best-selling The Sports Gene: Inside the Science of Extraordinary Athletic Performance. Epstein is a graduate of Columbia University where he earned a bachelor’s degree in environmental science and astronomy and a master’s degree in environmental science and journalism.

David Epstein held a Q and A with distinguished Glenbard representatives following his webinar, link HERE.

Dr. Seth Champman, Assistant Superintendent for Finance & Operations, hosted the event and shared the following takeaway:

"David Epstein shared his research-based perspective that for most children 'sampling' of many opportunities in sports or the arts will be more beneficial, and lead to greater overall success and happiness, than early 'specialization'.

 While having an early focus in one particular arena can yield positive outcomes in the short-term, the students who take more of a generalist approach to their extracurriculars experience enjoy larger gains over the long term.  Epstein recommends we talk to our children to understand what they enjoy, and  to help them discover what they learned from any given activity. 

 Always remember, setbacks and challenges do have an upside, as they provide an opportunity for personal growth. Many high profile (and highly successful) people have struggled early on,  and only achieved their successes much later in life, later than we may realize".

Thank you to our additional sponsors for this event: Deerfield Parent Network, Stand Strong Coalition, Parent Community Network, Link Together Coalition.

Resources

David Epstein web site HERE

Range Widely: Broadening your cognitive toolbox (newsletter) HERE

An Introduction to "Range" by David Epstein YouTube video HERE

WGN TV interview "Author David Epstein, `Range` says practice doesn`t make perfect"  (Jun 2019) HERE

Making the Modern Athlete: A Conversation with David Epstein and Malcolm Gladwell (Mar 2019) HERE

Are athletes really getting faster, better, stronger? (Apr 2014) TedTalk HERE

Why specializing early doesn't always mean career success (Sep 2020) TedTalk HERE

David Epstein discusses his book, "Range", with Daniel Pink at Politics and Prose (Jul 2019) HERE

Range Widely: “My dad threw me into every sport you could imagine.” article (Sep 2021) HERE

Range Widely: "Even Tiger and Mozart Weren't Tiger and Mozart" article (Dec 2021) HERE

15 Takeaways for Coaches and Parents from Range article by Marianne Werdel HERE

Amy Morin speaks to GPS on helping young people develop mental strength

On January 19, Amy Morin returned to GPS discussing her latest book  "13 Things Mentally Strong Kids Do".

Adults can struggle with how to best help their children balance everything: homework, extracurricular activities, chores, friendship drama and family. Too often, young people try to look in control, while they may feel unhappy, anxious and insecure on the inside. 

Psychotherapist Amy Morin shared tools to develop healthy habits and the mental strength to overcome life’s toughest challenges. She provided a guide to help young people think, feel and act stronger than ever.

Amy Morin never disappoints. She has an important message that is meaningful for young people and adults alike.   Morin has a gift for communicating insights and inspiration. She leaves her audience with takeaways that can make all the difference in the world.

Morin is editor-in-chief at Verywell Mind, psychology lecturer at Northeastern University and a bestselling author. Her books include “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do”, “13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do” and “13 Things Strong Kids Do.”

Josh Chambers, Assistant Superintendent of Human Resources hosted the event and shared the following takeaway:

"Amy Morin shared the tools to help our students' stay flexible, positive and empowered. I appreciated her suggestion to teach children to  treat themselves with kindness -to talk to  themselves the way they would talk to a good friend. 'What would you say to a friend in a similar situation?'  As parents we need to model calm, optimism and stay present in our child's life. We can teach habits of emotional strength and resilience."

Resources

Amy Morin's web site: https://amymorinlcsw.com/

Amy's Verywell Mind Podcast: https://www.verywellmind.com/the-verywell-mind-podcast-5113058

Take 5 videos from Amy's GPS visit on January 29, 2020

GPS Take 5 for Adults: Amy Morin on Raising Mentally Strong Kids https://youtu.be/KI7qndi61sQ

GPS Take 5 - Teen Talk: Am Morin on Be Resilient, Build Your Mental Muscle  https://youtu.be/T3aI6AeFEX0 

Audio: James Altucher Show: 13 Things Strong Kids Do (BUT really for Adults) with Amy Morin

 Video: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do.

Video: Forbes: Are You 'Mentally Strong'?

Video: 13 Things Mentally Strong People Avoid.

Video: TEDx Talks: The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong | Amy Morin | TEDxOcala .

Video: Good Day: Being a Mentally Strong Parent.

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