Is Your Phone Actually Controlling YOU?

Christine Carter, GPS speaker, writes on how social media can affect our happiness.  Read her strategies to reap the benefits of electronic connections at:



Is Your Phone Actually Controlling YOU?

Newly Added GPS Events

Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll Be: An Antidote to the College Admissions Mania

GPS Wed April 8 7pm 

Glenbard West auditorium, 670 Crescent Blvd Glen Ellyn  

  New York Times Columnist and Bestselling Author Frank Bruni explodes the myth that wealth and happiness hinge on acceptance by one of the most elite colleges.

Over the last few decades, Americans have turned college admissions into a terrifying and occasionally devastating process. In WHERE YOU GO IS NOT WHO YOU'LL BE, Frank Bruni explains why, giving students and their parents a new perspective on this brutal, deeply flawed competition and a path out of the anxiety that it provokes. Through statistics, surveys and the stories of hugely successful people who didn't attend the most exclusive schools, he demonstrates that many kinds of colleges—large and small—serve as ideal springboards. And he illuminates how to make the most of them. What matters in the end are a student's efforts in and out of the classroom, not the gleam of his or her diploma.

OVERWHELMED:How to Work, Love and Play When No One Has The Time

Monday, May 11 noon-1:30pm 

Marquardt Admin Center, 1869 Glen Ellyn Rd. 

Glendale Heights

Washington Post award -winning journalist Brigid Schulte, a harried mother realized she was living a life of all work and no play and decided to find out why she felt so overwhelmed.

Here is a book about modern life-a revelation of the misguided beliefs and stresses that have made leisure feel like a thing of the past and how we can find  time for it in the present.

 Participants will learn about parenting and the division of labor,why being overwhelmed physically affects the size of our brain, how school and home cultures haven't caught up with the way women live and work, and the key lessons about how to find time for the things that matter.

http://www.brigidschulte.com/ 

Thoughts on love at Valentines Day from a favorite former GPS speaker Dr Christine Carter

Three Risky Ways to Fall Deeply in Love Love comes from action, not waiting to be adored. Photo by James Marvin Phelps    Love feels magical and biological--something that just happens to us, something beyond our control. Research shows, however, that love is better thought of as behavioral--or even transactional. Yes, hormones play a role, but much more important is how we act with with the object of our affection. We do certain things, and those actions foster the emotions we associate with being in love. According to researcher Barbara Fredrickson, author of Love 2.0, we create our feelings of love, day after day. Or we don't create them, and love fades. So what actions lead to love? Here are three in honor of Valentine's Day, all based on fostering vulnerability. Before you run for the woods, hear me out. Yes, vulnerability can be uncomfortable because it involves, by definition, emotional exposure, uncertainty, and risk. But vulnerability allows trust and intimacy to develop and deepen, creating strong feelings of connection and love. Action #1: Take a risk together. Researchers think we tend to unconsciously conflate the high-arousal induced by doing something risky with the high-arousal of intense attraction--the two states feel similar. This creates a similar biochemistry and physiology as when we are first falling in love. This Valentine's Day, go straight for that adrenaline rush by doing something risky. Venture to an unknown place that feels a little daunting. Visit a karaoke bar, and actually sing. Try a new sport, one where you risk feeling silly or uncoordinated. Action #2: Get naked...emotionally. What can you reveal to your partner that he or she doesn't already know about you? Ask your date intimate questions to which you aren't sure you know the answer. We come to like people more when we engage in escalating, gradual back-and-forth "personal self-disclosure." Researchers have long been able to create profound feelings of being in love through self-disclosure (even between strangers!). Check out the 36 questions that Arthur Aron and his colleagues used to do this in the lab. And don't forget: How you respond when your partner is making him or herself vulnerable is also important. (Hint: turn off your phone and pay attention.) Action #3: Gaze into each other's eyes. Directly, for four full minutes. Set a timer. Don't talk. Breathe. Relax. This technique has been widely cited as a part of the experiment by Arthur Aron and pals--though I haven't been able to find reference to it in a published study. Still, this seems like a very solid tactic for creating feelings of intimacy and love. Stanford researcher Fred Luskin has people do this in his workshops, and it definitely creates big feelings of vulnerability. (Which is good, remember. The exposure is terrifying, but that is what we are after here.) Take Action: Choose one or more of the three actions above to do with your Valentine and then make a plan for making it happen.

 TEACHING YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT MONEY

MANAGEMENT NETS BIG RETURNS

Ron Lieber at GPS event on February 4, 2015

            

Ron Lieber is on a financial mission. He wants parents to understand that teaching their children about money management is a way of giving their children the tools that will help them achieve happy, productive and successful lives.

            The Personal Finance columnist for the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal and author of the new book The Opposite of Spoiled, Lieber gave a thought-provoking presentation to parents on the evening of February 4^th at Glenbard South as part of the Glenbard Parent Series.

            “Spoiled is what happens to kids. They are not born that way” says Lieber. Teaching kids about “financial literacy” makes use of essential character traits namely: prudence, curiosity, grit, generosity, modesty and perseverance.

            To train kids in financial literacy Lieber suggests that parents start by using allowance as a tool. Three categories kids should become familiar with are saving, spending and giving. Within the spending category parents need to teach their children the difference between “need” and “want.”

            Lieber suggests that parents determine a “threshold line” when determining need versus want, that amount they are willing to pay for an item. If kids want to spend above that threshold then they should be responsible for paying the difference.

            Household chores should not be a contingent of a child’s allowance. Lieber believes that kids need to understand that every family member has a duty to help maintain their home.  He also thinks it is a good idea to show your kids your household’s monthly expenses. This gives them a real sense as to how much it takes to care for a family.

            Generosity comes to children naturally at a very early age.  Having kids help determine the charities that parents give to can be very instructive and is a concrete demonstration of gratitude that kids can more easily grasp.

            Research shows that decisions about money are mostly driven by emotions not hard information. In a sense, discussions about money with your kids are discussions about their emotions. One of the most valuable lessons imparted is that of delayed gratification and teaching your children financial literacy will foster more self-reliant kids.

Suzanne Burdett is a Glenbard parent and a freelance writer

Glenbard Parent Naazish YarKhan shares an excellent
NPR podcast on the things that shape us

In "How to Become Batman," Alix and Lulu examine the surprising effect that our expectations can have on the people around us.  If we can get parents, teachers and kids to listen to this, and have a discussion, this could be the most inspiring lesson they will ever get. "How to Become Batman," impacts the way we parent, teach, the way we deal with the sick & disadvantaged, the shape our own lives can take. 

http://www.npr.org/programs/invisibilia/378577902/how-to-become-batman

Ron Lieber discusses book "The Opposite of Spoiled" Parent shares takeaway from GPS event, Video of the Presentation, Lieber's interviews from WGN News and WTTW Chicago Tonight

Parent Jennifer Muntz Glenbard East parent Jennifer Muntz attended last night's Glenbard Parent Series: (GPS) Navigating Healthy Families program How (and Why) To Talk to Your Kids About Money and Have Real Conversations That Imprint Good Values" with Ron Lieber. Ron Lieber  "I'm so glad I found the Glenbard Parent Series," Muntz said. "The programming is outstanding and it's a wonderful resource for the parent community.  More parents should take advantage of it."  Regarding Lieber's presentation, Muntz appreciated his advice. "He said, "Kids aren't born spoiled, they are made that way."  He talked about a lot of strategies of how to raise responsible kids focused on spending, saving and giving and ways to promote financial literacy in your home.  His perspective on allowance is that it's a teaching tool and it shouldn't be tied to chores.  Chores are a responsibility of being part of a family.  Every family member has to do chores.  Allowance, however, is a tool to teach kids how to manage money and learn about spending, saving and giving." Video of Lieber's 2/4/15 GPS presentation Links to Lieber's local news appearances: WGN Mid-day News WTTW Chicago Tonight

Happiness Tip: Fail at Your New Year’s Resolution

Dr Christine Carter  a former GPS speaker discusses reacting to setbacks and failures

Happiness Tip: Fail at Your New Year's Resolution

This week is an important one for people who made New Year's resolutions. Here's why: if you can keep your resolution for the rest of the week, you'll be much more likely to end the year having kept it, too. 

When starting a new habit, it can be frustrating to fail. But failing is also essential to the process of creating a habit that sticks. Unless you are some sort of superhero, you will not be able to get into a new habit perfectly the first time. You'll trip and fall and royally screw up-just like the rest of us. And then you'll have the opportunity to learn something from your failure that you probably couldn't have learned any other way.

In other words, faltering is a normal part of the process. It doesn't matter if you have a lapse, or even a relapse, but it does matter how you respond. If you've had a slip, don't get too emotional or succumb to self-criticism.

Take Action: If you've started faltering, the first thing to do is forgive yourself. Remember, lapses are a part of the process, and feeling guilty or bad about your behavior will not increase your future success. Make a plan for the next time you face a challenge similar to the one that caused your lapse. What will you do differently? What have you learned? What temptation did you face that you can remove? Is there something that you need to tweak? Were you stressed or tired or hungry-and if so, how can you prevent that the next time?

See More:

Happiness Tip: Fail at Your New Year’s Resolution

New York Times Money Columnist Rob Lieber
"The Opposite of Spoiled: How (and Why) to Talk to Your Kids About Money..."
Wednesday, February 4, 7:00 pm at Glenbard South

February is a short month, but filled with Great GPS events:

Rob Lieber: 

“The Opposite of Spoiled: How (and Why) to Talk to Your Kids About Money”

Wednesday, Feb 4, 7:00 pm at Glenbard South

 FAFSA/Finanical Aid Workship

Saturday, February 7, 10:30am-1:00pm 

at Glenbard East

Mark Sterner:

"A Powerful Lesson: Living With The Consequences"

Live Life Well Week Speaker

Thursday, Feb 19, 7:00 p.m. at Glenbard North Auditorium

Dr. J. Stuart Ablon: “Collaborative Problem Solving to Resolve Conflict”

Thursday, Feb 26, 7:00 p.m. at Glenbard West Auditorium

Dr. J. Stuart Albon: “Rethinking Challenging Kids: Collaborative Problem Solving”

Friday, Feb 27, 8 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. at Glenbard South Auditorium

For More Information: 

http://tinyurl.com/GlenbardParentSeries87

GPS Presents Alan Graham, PhD 
Positive Psychology and ADHD Coaching
January 29, Noon-2PM at CCSD #93